Dear oh dear

Arthur Dear was baptised at Downton, Wiltshire on 21 September 1828, shortly after his birth.  He was the eighth child of Samuel Dear, a labourer, and Elizabeth Mitchell.  On 30 May 1846, at the age of 17 (although the marriage certificate says that he was 19), he married Christabella, the eighteen-year-old daughter of John Kervill from neighbouring Redlynch.  I was certain that, with one party bearing the unusual name of Christabella, I'd be able to keep track of this family with little trouble.  It was a bit more complicated than I'd thought.

Arthur had been living in Redlynch with his parents at the time of the 1841 census, on which he was described as an ag lab - agricultural labourer.  By 1851, still living in Redlynch and now married to Christabella, he had graduated to wood dealer.  They had a little daughter, Rhoda, aged 3.  Another child, Betsy Harriet, would follow before the end of that summer, but she would live only three weeks.  The baptismal records of St Mary, Redlynch, also recorded a daughter Emily, christened there on 23 June 1853.

Come 1861, Arthur, evidently widowed and remarried in the intervening decade, was living in Shaftesbury, Dorset, and trading as a fishmonger and potato dealer.  His new wife's name was Emily, although I couldn't find a record of their marriage, and living with them was their three-year-old son, Frederick, born in Wimborne, Dorset.  Fast-forward another decade and Arthur, Emily and Frederick were now living in Southampton, where Arthur was an egg merchant.

Another ten years passed and Arthur had apparently lost and gained another wife, as he was now married to Clara, nearly half his age, and living in Oxford with their five young children.  He had expanded his business to encompass not only eggs but also butter.

The 1891 census, which found Arthur, Clara and eight children at Bournemouth, also showed that their two-year-old son Ernest had been born in Kingston, Canada, so there had been some overseas travel.  Arthur and Clara continued to live in Freemantle, Southampton, where they appeared in 1901 and 1911, and where Arthur died, aged 86, on 25 April 1915.

Earlier this week I read an article about the 1911 and 2011 censuses, the comments to which included a number of people who said that they intend to lie in their responses.  Perhaps they think that their proposed defiance is innovative, but they're following a well-worn path.  For example, Arthur appeared on eight consecutive censuses during his lifetime.  During seven of these he said that the woman living with him was his wife, but that was true only in 1851, 1901 and 1911.

I mentioned earlier that Christabella's name should help me track down this family, but sometime between 1851 and 1861 Arthur appeared to have remarried.  What I couldn't find was a record of his marriage, nor could I find a record of Christabella's death.  I tried various possible spellings for her name and finally decided that I'd look for her in 1861, just in case she hadn't died.  Which, in fact, was exactly what had (or hadn't) happened: in 1861 she was living in Southampton with her two surviving daughters, Rhoda and Emily.  She described herself as married and a charwoman.  At the same time her husband was living in Dorset with someone he described as his wife.  Interesting.

Could I be certain I had the right Arthur?  No other Arthur Dears born in Downton or Redlynch (the birthplace varied from census to census, although his baptism was in Downton) around 1828 appeared.  I couldn't find him abroad.  Christabella said that she was married rather than widowed, so it was reasonable to assume that her husband was still alive somewhere.

Christabella and one of her daughters had returned to Redlynch by 1871.  She was working as a domestic, still saying that she was married.  In 1881 and 1891 she was in Millbrook, Hampshire with her daughter and son-in-law, working as a lace maker, still married.  In the first quarter of 1896, she died.

Also in the first quarter of 1896 is the registration of the marriage of Arthur Dear and Clara Frances Green at Southampton.  This appeared to be Christbella's widower and the woman who had been described as his wife on the 1881 and 1891 censuses.  I knew it was the same family as that of the censuses because of their son, Ernest, born in Kingston, Ontario: his birth certificate said that his parents were Arthur Dear, gentleman, and Clara Green.  I'm fairly positive that this is also the same Arthur who had previously been married to Christabella, otherwise why did he and Clara not marry until Christbella had died?  On the 1911 census, which asked married couples how many completed years their current marriage has lasted, Arthur and Clara said 38 years, suggesting that they first met around 1873, which ties in with the 1874 birth of their first child.  Clara also said that she was the mother of 14 children, ten of whom were then living.

As for Emily, Arthur's "wife" in between Christabella and Clara, she was born Emily Barrett around 1830 in Wimborne, Dorset.  After her relationship with Arthur ended, sometime after the 1871 census and before his relationship with Clara Green began around 1873/4, she went to live with her sister and brother-in-law, Daniel and Susan Haylett, in Wimborne.  On the 1881 census she gave her name as Emily Dear, her occupation as charwoman, and said that she was married.  Her death was registered in Wimborne in 1883.

Clara survived Arthur by nearly 20 years, dying in Freemantle on 30 March 1933.  I wonder how much his three families knew of one another.  I also wonder who left whom: that both Christabella and Emily continued to describe themselves as married rather than widowed suggests that they had been left and still held out some expectation that their husband might return.  There must have been some connection, perhaps between the children of the relationships, as Arthur knew of Christabella's death and immediately married Clara as soon as possible.  One assumes that Clara, and likely Emily, must have been aware of Christabella's existence, especially as Arthur was unable to re-marry until Christabella had died.  Did Clara know of Emily and vice versa?  Did Christabella know of Emily and Clara?  I'd love to find some first-hand account one day.

In the meantime, here are Arthur's children:
with Christabella Kervill, born circa 1828, Redlynch, Wiltshire; married 30 May 1846, Downton, Wiltshire; died 1896, South Stoneham District, Hampshire
1) Rhoda, likely the child baptised at Redlynch on 25 April 1847; married firstly George Easom, 1867; married secondly John Henry S. Noble, 1903; died 1919, Southampton
2) Betsy Harriet, baptised 11 August 1851, Redlynch; buried 1 September 1851, Redlynch
3) Emily, baptised 23 June 1853, Redlynch; married John Frederick Ford, 28 June 1871, Salisbury, Wiltshire

with Emily Barrett, born circa 1830, Wimborne, Dorset; died 1883, Wimborne District, Dorset
4) Frederick Arthur, born 1857, Wimborne; married Sophia Keen, 1887, Oxfordshire; died 1929, Oxfordshire

with Clara Frances Green, born 1853, Southampton; married 1896, Southampton; died 30 March 1933, 1 Dyer Road, Freemantle, Southampton
5) Harry Green, born 1874, Portsmouth; married Ellen Maria Lowe, 1898; died 17 March 1930, Freemantle, Southampton
6) Arthur Green, born 1875, Oxford; died 1895, Hampshire
7) Ada, born 1876, Oxford
8) William, born 1879, Swallowfield, Berkshire; married Elizabeth New, 1899, Hampshire
9) Lily, born 1880, Oxford; married Edwin John Chillingford 1904, Hampshire; died 1920, Southampton
10) Nellie, born 1882, Hampshire; died 1888, Southampton
11) Bertie, born 1885, Bournemouth; died 1894, Hampshire
12) Frank, born 1887, Bournemouth
13) Ernest, born 23 April 1889, Kingston, Ontario, Canada
14) Gerty, born 7 Jun 1891, Bournemouth; married firstly Edwin Joseph Lott, 1911, Southampton; married secondly George Morrison Coull, 1930, Southampton; died 1971 Henley, Oxfordshire
15) Winifred, born 1893, Bournemouth; married Frederick William Gurd, 1921, Southampton; died 1955, Dorset
16) Ralph, born 12 August 1895, Christchurch; married Daisy Appleton, 1918, Southampton; died 1983, Southampton
17) Mona Kathleen, born 25 August 1897, Christchurch; married William J. Hiscock, 1918, Southampton; died 1985, Southampton
18) Roy, born 1901, Hampshire; married Eva Cox, 1921, Southampton; died 1952, Southampton